March 25, 2015
There are many different relationships people experience. Relationships can be made with friends, a spouse, co-worker, family members, or any given person. Relationship is defined as, “the way in which two or more people, groups, countries, etc., talk to, behave toward, and deal with each other”(website) A relationship has many different aspects, one in which is hardly ever unavoidable is conflict. The disagreements between two people takes a lot of communication to try and work through and also when learning about someone’s differences. Negotiation will play a major part in a relationship as with two people it is hard always wanting the same things from this particular relationship, whether it be something small as in how the house gets cleaned, grades, or major issues such as bills being paid or how the children will be raised.
Recently, observing a friend’s relationship a tough situation has occurred leaving one of them feeling rejected or that they embarrass the other. The relationship is of two females, they both just came out to family and friends that they want to be together. One of the females (Communicator A) stays closed off and does not really like to partake in PDA (Public Display of Affection) and the other (Communicator B) wants to be able to show their love for their partner whenever they want. Looking in on this situation individual communication is closely tied to them. With “Communicator A wanting to change the way Communicator B’s mind about an issue or secure concessions toward a negotiated agreement”(Lewicki, 2010, p. 232). Both have communicated what they want from each other and negotiated together. The agreement they have come to is to make sure both parties are giving their best. With Communicator A understanding that it is a comfort level for Communicator B and also Communicator B understanding that A just wants to feel loved and cherished by the other without thinking they are still trying to hide them from people.
The phrase “Pick your battles” has been spoken by many parents dealing with their unruly children at some point in time. Other times negotiation comes in to play and in some cases seems to actually help. A mother and her four year old daughter were having a rough day. A sitter of the mother’s offered to take the children to near by park. The sitter told the children they could bring one toy with them but it could only be one. The four year old pouted and threw a fit over only being able to bring one that the mother then negotiated with the child that she can bring more but she had to find a bag to carry them in because the sitter was not going to carry her things around. When referencing this situation to negotiation the would be a successful integrative negotiation, even with the child getting their own way. However, both parties did come to a mutually acceptable solution with, “the presence of a common goal, faith in the mother’s problem solving ability by allowing the child to take more toys if she carried them, a belief in the child’s validity of carrying the bag, they both were motivated and committed to working together, trust, both displayed clear and accurate communication, and they both understood what each other expected which are the dynamics of integrative negation”(Lewicki, 2011, p. 99).
A family member recently just went through a divorce from his wife, while some divorce processes might be easy this one had two tempered individuals, adding a baby to that made everything a little more difficult. In this case the, “Distributive issues within the relationship negotiation was emotionally hot”(Lewicki, 2011, p. 322). While both parties wanted the time with their son, neither could come up with a way to make it fair. They both, “felt strongly about the issue and at times acted provocatively and became angry with each other several times” (Lewicki, 2011, p. 322). In most cases both parents acted on the anger and...
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